Service

Service.

I love service.

I am a sadist. During sex, I switch. I enjoy bottoming for that as well as for the occasional flogging or what-have-you, usually a thuddy implement. I'm primarily a top. I'm also a dominant.

I used to find dominance to be absolutely exhausting.

To stay in the frame of mind where I am the Master, I must be in control, I must be strict and cruel and creative and completely in charge, as well as kind and merciful and loving is hard for me. I prefer to be a creative sadist. I'm very hands on and when it comes to more emotional or mental scenes, I tend to get tired pretty quickly and revert to my sadistic self, since I'm a more physical person.

Which I'm sure is a bit frustrating for my boy, who is not only a wonderfully tough maso (our pet name for masochists) but also very submissive. He needs submission to be able to get himself together somedays. Just like we both need a good kicking-the-shit-out-of-him scene when we haven't played for awhile. Most kinksters will agree it's a major stress-relief.

So, while I find dominance to be exhausting, especially when I was first stepping into the role (back when I had no idea what a sadist even was) I find the idea of service to be totally liberating. I can focus on my needs and without putting much creative thought into it, this fulfills the needs of my submissive. I can ask for food, drink, massage, attention. Even me saying 'pet meeee!' is demanding a bit of service, albeit in the whiniest voice possible.

I've asked for essays, for writing, for art, for pedicures. I've asked for much more creative things, too, but I find the little things are easiest to do and they add into bigger things.

The big D/s scenes are more fun this way, though we haven't done one in awhile. I find it's easier if I break it down into little things. Boot worship, maybe throw in some sadism there, add a bit of body worship, orgasm control, bondage...

I admit, I used to panic when I stepped into my D/s role. My brain would immediately rush from idea to idea and the scene would turn into a jumble. I'd threaten him with certain things and never follow through. I'd forget what I was doing and confuse him completely when I asked for several things at once. Note to self (and other D-types who have this problem); be clear when you're instructing someone. They can't read your mind and they really want to make you happy.

It's taken some time, but now that we're here, I find that I really enjoy having a butler as much as I enjoy having a maso. I love having him 'run the household'. Though a lot of people on the outside of our relationship have commented on how T seems to run everything and be in charge, the duty of a butler is to keep everything running and to make sure their master doesn't have to.

And really, I'd be awful at taking care of a wine cellar (not that we have one).

Not everyone who is submissive is good at service, or wants to be. It takes dedication, love, a stubborn perfectionism and eye for detail. I only wish I could be more the Master my boy deserves. <3

Sex

Another eye-catcher from Real Dominant Women.

I admit, I had to post this one because her hair reminds me of Andromeda's hair from my earlier post. That is some amazing hair!

Also, though this blog is about sex as well as kink, bdsm, etc, it's pretty rare that I post pictures of penetrative sex, especially with a straight couple. It certainly used to squick me, as a gender-unhappy kinky person who is usually seen as lady-shaped, but I also didn't want this blog to be seen as porn. Yes, it's certainly porny and sexy and full of wank-fodder, but having vanilla-ish sex posted often or even at all just sat wrong with me. But to be uncomfortable by something consensual and lovely (like this photo) is kind of silly, so we might be getting more photos of penetrative, vaginal sex.

So, here, have some sex; a lovely female top using her handcuffed boy to get herself off.

PS, Real Dominant Women, I really like a lot of your photos, but your name makes me think of 'the ONE TWUE WAY' and makes me giggle/sad.

Point of view

Alright, ignoring the fact that I got this image at Real Dominant Women... who is in charge in this photo?

I have enjoyed straight razor shaving very much. I have topped from either side of it. I have shaved my boy this way and I delight in the power and control I have with a razor at his throat. It's very sexy and a powerful feeling, knowing how easy it would be to slit his throat. Not to mention how good the razor feels, it's a wonderful sensation play.

I have also topped in the way that I have my boy shave me. I relax in the tub, read a book, soak under a towel, get all lathered up and shaved. It feels spectacular and it's his service to me. He doesn't have the control or power because he's not in that mindset and neither am I. I have the power because he is doing me this service, keeping his dominant relaxed and keeping his appearance sharp.

This is why I enjoy this photo, to be honest. Not only because I have a hard on for straight razor shaving, but also because this can be seen in either light, depending on the viewer.

Submission

So, before I start this, let me just say, I like words. I love words. I love etymology and learning about how certain words are connected and why that is and what words have meant in the past. Have some of my musings.


According to Dictionary.com;

sub·mis·sion

noun

1.

an act or instance of submitting.

2.

the condition of having submitted.

3.

submissive  conduct or attitude.

sub·mit·ting.

verb (used with object)

1.

to give over or yield to the power or authority of another(often used reflexively).

2.

to subject to some kind of treatment or influence.

sub·mis·sive

adjective

1.

inclined or ready to submit;  unresistingly or humbly obedient: submissive servants.

2.

marked by or indicating submission: a submissive reply.

Related forms

sub·mis·sive·ly, adverb

sub·mis·sive·ness, noun

non·sub·mis·sive, adjective

non·sub·mis·sive·ly, adverb

non·sub·mis·sive·ness, noun

Synonyms 
1.  tractable, compliant, pliant, amenable. 2.  passive, resigned,patient, docile, tame, subdued. 

Antonyms 
1.  rebellious, disobedient. 

And my own note; for antonyms, I'd have to add bratty.

According to Wikipedia;

Submission is the acknowledgement of the legitimacy of the power of one's superior or superiors.

I find the definition from Wikipedia interesting. Acknowledgement of the legitimacy of the power of one's superior. Accepting someone's power as valid. I actually like this definition a lot, mostly because of my experiences with my boy. Most doms assume that because they are dominants and he is a submissive, that automatically makes them dominant to him.  Even if there is no discussion of play, they assume that he, being submissive, is submissive to everyone who considers themselves a D-type.

Just because I hold all the power in the world over my own submissive, doesn't mean I have any effect on any other sub. Just because your sub fawns over you at the drop of a hat, doesn't mean they're submissive to anyone who casually introduces themselves as a dominant. That would make the relationship a bit cheap, don't you think? If they'll drop to their knees for anyone, it isn't special when they do it for you!

My boy, for all that he is a submissive, isn't always submissive. He is a take-charge sort of person and he gets things done. If that means he has to bull his way through the plans of me or our dominant or top friends, he has no problem doing so. He likes to organize, which often makes him the one in charge.

Yes, he is mine. However, that doesn't mean that he isn't a person of his own with his own plans and ideas for everyday necessities. If my wanting him to do something interferes with his need to butler, I'll usually wait until he's through. His butlering (yes, this is my favorite new word) and organizing is part of his submission to me. He makes my life easier. He does my taxes, makes appointments for me, pays all the bills and basically does all the running around. Without his personality and drive to do what needs doing, I wouldn't have the wonderful butler that I do. 

I often relinquish the front seat of the car to him, due to his carsickness. That could easily be considered submitting, since a lot of protocols would demand he sit in the back. As a concerned spouse, I wouldn't subject him to sitting in the back where he'll feel ill. However, as a dominant, should I submit to his needs? Of course I should. Even if we are in a power exchange where I have the power, that doesn't mean I should always use the power to please myself. Pleasing and caring for your submissive is incredibly important and any dominant who uses submission to tend to their own needs and ignore the needs of their submissives is an abuser. There has to be a balance in every relationship. Everyone has needs that need meeting, even if they're as simple as 'this makes my tummy hurt, can we change this?'

Is my power over him legitimate? Yes and no. Really, I'd say that I don't deserve to have him submit. I'd say that I have to earn it as much as anyone would have to earn respect and acknowledgement. I am not a particularly dominant person. I have my days and we have our scenes where he wouldn't dare question who is in charge, but that doesn't mean I am always dominant to him. Because he chooses to acknowledge my power over him, that makes my dominance legitimate.

A dominant without a willing submissive is a pianist without a piano. Sure, you might have all this skill and knowledge, but without someone to acknowledge it and allow you to put it into practice... you're just a person.

breakfast and foot worship

This reminds me of the vacation my boy and I took just last week... we stayed in a lovely Bed and Breakfast with flowery things everywhere and they delivered our food to us on a beautiful tray... haha.

Lovely boy. I wonder what implement she has on the table there? A crop?

From Other World Kingdom.

lapping at her milk

A sweet pet laps milk up from a bowl at her Master's feet. Ahh, the gloves held behind the back... her back raised over her head, her dark hair... his boots!

I so happy.

From Combat Boot fetish.

How not to approach a dominant woman

So! I've been wanting to write one of these for a long time. Because I am female bodied and identify as a sadist, or a dominant on certain sites that don't allow you to choose sadist, I have received a LOT of messages from submissive men looking for a dominant. They ignored the fact that I listed myself as gay, married, not looking, etc. And most of them made these mistakes.

If you've been finding it very difficult to keep messages going back and forth with a female dominant or have been getting a lot of rejections, these suggestions might help.

Keep in mind that I'm a queer sadist, not a female dominant. Also keep in mind that I have a few dominant female friends and we rant about messages together.

Here it goes!

Art from Nifty.

How not to approach a dominant woman:

Do not start by saying 'I am not worth your time'.
If you tell someone you're not worth their time, they might not bother trying to prove you wrong. They'll probably just ignore you. This isn't a sign of submission, this is a sign of you thinking yourself worthless. There is a difference between humility and having no self-esteem.

Do not use a title.
Calling someone Mistress, Lady, Ma'am, Miss, etc, should wait until you're in an established relationship. If you feel the need to call them by some sort of title, why not ask and find out if that's okay with them? Otherwise you're involving them in your kink without their consent. And if it is okay, what title do they prefer? I know I get much grumpier if people call me Mistress than if people call me Sir.

Do not say 'I am a dominant, but I'd submit to you'.
This is not flattering. I've met and heard from lots of men who have done this. It just makes me sad that they can't admit that they like to switch from time to time. There is nothing wrong with submitting and there is nothing wrong with wanting to submit to people you're attracted to, but calling yourself a dominant and turning around and begging a woman to be your mistress gets old fast.

Do not start by saying 'I know I am not what you're looking for'.
This falls under my first point. She'll probably believe you and not waste any more time on you.

Do not say 'I am VERY submissive'.
Just saying that you're submissive will do. She'll figure out your limits as they fit with hers if she has an interest.

Do not make comments on her physical appearance.
I'd make an exception for something like 'I really enjoyed your photos'. But I've gotten a lot of 'wow, so you don't shave down there?' and 'I like your tits'. Instant dislike. Just keep it respectful if you feel the need to say it.

Do not give her a grocery list of your fetishes and turn ons.
This is not what anyone wants right off the bat unless they are just looking for a quick night of fun. If you want her to be your dominant and to have a relationship with you, try talking about yourself as a whole. Telling her about your kinks is part of that, but be a whole person. Tell her about your hobbies, your pets, your interests. I've had better conversations with male submissives about the kind of farms we've worked on and what sort of food we like than I have with any boy that gives me a list of things he wants me to do to him. It's impersonal and not most people's cup of tea. If she wants a list of your kinks, she can always ask.

Do NOT start with 'Would you do this to me?'
Wait until she's agreed to play with you at all! Wait until she knows a bit about you! I can't even express how many times I've gotten this and above all things, it drives me crazy.

Do not start with 'May I please have the honour to chat with you/serve you?'
This sort of protocol is reserved for people you're already playing with. This isn't showing submission. This is trying to play with someone who hasn't consented or even really met you yet. Talk to her like you would anyone else. 'Hey, interested in chatting sometime?'

Do not say 'I am looking for (whatever) with a dominant woman.'
We know you're looking for a dominant woman. The way you say it makes women feel like you don't care who it is, that it could be ANY dominant woman. Which most people find insulting. If you don't see what's wrong with that, I can't help you. However, if you understand what I'm getting at, consider saying something like this instead; 'I am hoping for (whatever) with someone as (interesting, creative, sadistic, etc) as you.'

Do not continue messaging someone who has not responded. 
Give them at least a few weeks. Then, if you're still pining, send a reminder. Something simple like 'Hey, just seeing if you got my message, still hoping to chat'. Do not beg, do not whine. Just try to initiate a conversation. If she doesn't respond, either she's not interested or she has some other reason to not respond. Leave it at that and move on. And one more thing, don't make your last message 'Oh, I guess you're not interested...'. It makes you sound like a kicked puppy.

Do not tell her you have no limits/will do anything for her.
Everyone into kink and bdsm (and everyone in general) has limits. If you want to include your limits, maybe start with the basics. 'I am interested in edge play, however my limits are consent, children, animals, permanent scars, scat, whatever.' If she is a responsible dominant, she'll much prefer that you told her your limits than told her 'I'll do anything!' People who say that to me online always appear in my head as the foaming mouth guy from Avatar.

Does this look like someone you would want to dominate?

If you think it might make her uncomfortable, don't say it.

The basics are:
-read profiles before you message people
-write your message a few times if you need to to get it right
-be polite, not subservient
-do not involve her in your fantasies without asking permission (IE; calling her Mistress)
-act like a whole person and be yourself

Dominant women are still just women. They want to know you as a person. Most of them have to like you as a person in order to want to dominate you. Show them what a wonderful person you are and offer them something no one else can; you!

Good luck on your search.
M

Kneeling in submission

This artist has some of the most beautiful work. I think this might have been done in coffee, which I'm totally curious to try. But beyond that, just look at their poses. He kneels, head bowed, hands up as if to touch her hand on his head. Such a beautiful physical submission to her.

Though my terrible brain sees her other hand over her face and I don't know what to think besides *facepalm*.

On the other hand... I have had this happen to me by someone who was a friend and not in any way my play partner or even a potential play partner. It really pissed me off that he would try to physically submit to me without my consent. Please, subs, talk about playing with people before you do this in front of them.

Absolutely gorgeous work by the very talented Jenny Dolfen.

A domme

I often find this idea amongst primarily online male submissives; I want a domme. Any domme.

I present as a woman in my community, butch though I am, just because it's easier than talking to people about my gender and having to explain something that doesn't effect them anyway. So, when people contact me online, though my gender is not stated on certain profiles, they contact me as if I am a female dominant. Both of these things are inaccurate, as I'm a sadist with a few dominant leanings, but I generally just leave it at 'I'm a sadist'.

When male submissives (most of whom I have never met in public, and probably will never meet in public due to their belief that someone will see them with kinky people and just know that they are with kinky people, no matter how vanilla we look) approach me, oftentimes I will ask them what they are looking for in a dominant. The idea that I get from this reminds me of this picture. They want the leather and latex, the 'dominant attitude' and sex appeal of being controlled and sexually used by a powerful, stereotypically beautiful woman.

And so, when they figure out that I am a person, who does not fit the tailored fantasy clothes they have ready for their ideal domme, they back away. They stop messaging. They tell me I am not a real dominant. They accuse me of being a man. They accuse me of being a bitch, a tease, etc, etc. And I am not the only one who gets these messages.

I want a domme. Any domme will do.

As long as she can fit in my fantasy bubble of what a domme is and how she will make me happy.

Art from Dominance and submission.

A different cock tonight

Is this supposed to be humiliation play? Because I don't know if I see it as humiliating. Just obedience and servitude. If that's what your top wants... well, he should do it. He shouldn't feel inadequate, since he's obeying and doing as he's told.

This is not humiliating. He's just a good boy.

Devalued male submission

“The BDSM blogosphere has been all aflutter lately about the devaluation of male submission. And it’s about fucking time. Because the kink scene treats male subs as if they are unwanted, uninvited guests, not recognizing the fact that they are real people with feelings of their own, that their dominant partners cherish them. Every time I see a Fetlife profile that reads “I’m not attracted to submissive men” (frequently, in my experience, on the profiles of female switches and occasionally other female dominants), my stomach clenches. They don’t seem to realize that such an attitude is linked to another problem in the scene: the tokenization of female dominants.

The public BDSM scene has a predilection towards the maledom femalesub dynamic. If you are female, you are presumed to be submissive unless stated otherwise, and if you are male, you are presumed to be dominant unless stated otherwise. (And if you are non-gender-normative, if you don’t fit in a nice little ticky-box, then the scene may accept you but not really know what to do with you.) As much as we would like to believe that the scene is a problem-free sexual utopia, it still suffers from many of the problems that mainstream society does. Straight male sexuality is prioritized, and thus straight male doms are the prevailing players in the scene. Straight male doms have no use for male subs, yet they still like female doms—they like us because we bring a certain energy to the scene and are fun to talk to and be around and because they hope that maybe we’ll co-top their girls with them and that they might be able to get into our pants.

So my sexuality is something that people in the scene can appreciate and sort of see the value in from afar. But the object of that sexuality is not accepted in the scene. While male subs are not seen as potential objects of desire, female doms are seen only as objects of desire. That’s how I feel sometimes as a femme dom in the public scene: they see me, but not my desires.

I feel like Geordi.


In Star Trek: the Next Generation, the character Geordi LaForge never got laid (this is where I out myself as a nerd, if the pseudonym and the lab coat and the giant boner for science weren’t already a dead giveaway). They had to have a character who was black and disabled, to show how progressive and inclusive they were. But they weren’t progressive enough to give him a sex life. Hollywood had this ridiculous idea about the primal, savage nature of black men, especially in relation to their sexuality. And so the closest poor Geordi ever gets to having a sexual relationship is with a holographic character, and even that is unconsummated–he gets blue-balled by his own fantasies, because oh no, if we show a black man in a sexual situation then the viewers will have to be reminded of the fact that he has a penis. We all know that there’s nothing scarier to mainstream 90′s American culture than a black man’s penis–the popularity of racist porn stemming from the eroticization of this fear belies it. (Not to mention the fact that Geordi falls right into the trope of “disabled characters don’t have a sexuality.”)  Geordi and I are both welcomed in our respective communities, as long as we keep our sexual desires silent—closeted—and to ourselves.

When I meet het male doms, I always try to make it abundantly clear to them from the beginning of our association that I am not a switch, I am not interested in playing, I am not interested in co-topping girls with them, I am not interested in anything beyond friendship with them.

And often, they continue to be friendly. And I like that because I am also friendly and I like to have friends, of all orientations. And I think to myself, “you know, we’re different, we get off on different things, but maybe he can appreciate me for who I am even though I’m not submissive and he knows we can’t have that type of interaction.”

“Maybe he can still respect me and the dynamic that I enjoy.” But then I hear language that refers to male submission as if it is something disgusting or shameful.

And that’s what bothers me.

A few months ago, maymay was referred to as “such a fucking weak-ass male submissive that he makes male submission look bad” by a dominant man who is well-known in the local community.

This writing has since been deleted. But the harmful words still ring in my ears. Maymay is not making male submissives look bad. The author is the one who is making male submissives look bad, because he is using the words “male submissive” as an insult. Would he have said “a fucking weak-ass gay”? I think not, at least, not in the San Francisco scene—such words have a clear underlying implication of homophobia. But somehow, using someone’s D/s status as a slur is acceptable.

While I don’t enjoy the maledom-femsub dynamic myself, I think it is a completely valid sexuality. I would never presume to tell someone otherwise. These het-male-doms who make up the mainstream of the subculture that we inhabit? I think they like me and respect me and think I’m hot, but I don’t know if they think my sexuality is valid.

And so I feel tokenized. It’s not fair to me, because where would I, a femme dom, be without my masculine sub? We are two sides of a coin. Today I am not beating my queer drum; today I am borrowing maymay’s drum: You cannot truly respect me without respecting my submissive as well. If you value me, you must value him.

There is a lot of male submissive-shaming in the public scene.  You’ll hear it all the time.  “Male subs are creepy,” “male subs spoil the atmosphere, so we don’t want to encourage them.” And while I have indeed encountered many male submissives who have acted in inappropriate ways, I have one question to ask: why do you suppose that male subs like maymay who do respect boundaries don’t feel welcome in the scene? It’s not because they are making male submission look bad, it’s because you are equating male submission with badness.

And by doing this, you are hurting me.

This is the reason I go to sleep alone every night. It’s not because there’s something wrong with me as a potential romantic/sexual partner. It’s because there’s no one for me to date. Because everyone’s been telling all the male submissives that they’re unwanted for so long that they won’t come out to play. So I’m sitting here in my kinky sandbox with my toys all by myself.

And it hurts.

If you respect me, if you respect my identity as a female dominant, then recognize that when you devalue male submission, you are devaluing the objects of my desire, and by doing so, you. are. hurting. me. too.”

Again, by Professor Chaos.

Doms don't cry

Mainstream femdom plays into the notion that female dominants are invulnerable to emotion, with images of cold ice-queens who endlessly berate their submissives, referring to them as worthless or pathetic.  I will never understand this.  Why bother owning something worthless?  If he’s so pathetic, why are you playing with him?

And then, of course, there’s withholding sex as a punishment.  This, too, I do not understand.  Why withhold sex?  I wouldn’t want to withhold sex.  I love sex.  Not that I don’t enjoy chastity play, but I prefer to think of it as putting my favorite toy away when I’m not using it.  Perhaps most femdoms are, in fact, ice-queens with no sex drive but who have an endless drive for inflicting cruelty and degradation.  But I suspect not.  I suspect more of them are like me.

I am a dominant woman.  I am not invulnerable to desire.  On the contrary, I am super-susceptible to desire.  My desire controls me.  My desire incites me to control others.  The key is not about not having power–but about taking that power away.  Not giving up control, but the loss of control caused by another.  I don’t want someone who is always submissive, without any input from another–I want my dominance to be the key that unlocks the feeling of surrender inside of them.  I don’t want someone who is worthless.  I don’t want someone pathetic. I want someone valuable.  I refuse to devalue submission, or the people that submit to me.  It’s not that I’m better than they are or that my desires are worth more.  It’s just that my  desires are…more important.

I am a dominant woman.  I’m not perfect.  I don’t think of myself as perfect.  I don’t think I am better than anyone else.  I don’t have super high self-esteem.  I do have healthy self-esteem, most of the time.  But above all, I hold myself in high esteem.

I’ve seen the term “slaveheart”–the idea that a slave is someone who has a heart that longs to be owned by another.  Slavehearts are often depicted as fragile and vulnerable.  But there is no counterpart for dominants, as though our feelings don’t matter, as if our hearts can’t get broken.  So I am proposing a corollary term for a dominant: a dominant spirit.  A spirit that yearns to possess and overthrow.  A spirit that is passionate and loving and fierce and tender.

As I walk this path, as I make this journey (although at times I loathe the trite comparison between BDSM exploration and a journey) I see the insecurities in my heart like cracks on the sidewalk.  Thus far, I have a much better idea of who I am and what I want than I did a few years ago.  For that, I am grateful.  But sometimes it makes me feel hopeless because what I want seems so unattainable.  The further I walk on this path, the more cracks I see in the pavement.

I am a dominant woman.  I am not invulnerable to desire.  I am not invulnerable to loneliness.  Or heartbreak.

Written by Professor Chaos.

boot to the face

Rawr, another absolute gem from Combat boot fetish. I love his fingers and that expression on his face. I have a photo of my boy under my boot that's quite similar to this. Which might be part of why I love it so.

I have such a boner.

On being ‘born a dominant’

A lot of people seem to have this notion that people are born dominant. This applies to submissives, masochists, sadists and switches, etc, but for the sake of simplicity of writing, I’ll stick to dominants. Though I believe that some people are born with certain tendencies, I do not believe anyone to be a dominant born.

Eg; I am born. I have a proclivity towards taking the top role during kink. However, due to society’s view on kink and never educating myself about it, I never take the opportunity to try this role or to learn anything about kink, D/s or topping. Am I a top?

I am born. I have an interest in receiving pain. Due to it being taboo and my belief that it is wrong, I never indulge myself. I never truly enjoy pain, as any enjoyment I receive leaves me with a sense of guilt. Am I a masochist?

I believe that someone has to practice to learn this sort of role. It’s like saying that you’re a musician. You’ve only ever touched an instrument once, but you know you like it. No one has ever enjoyed hearing you play, but you were born a musician. If you’ve never played with anyone and never tried to learn more or to better yourself as a dominant, how can you call yourself a dominant anymore than that musician can call themselves a musician?

It also goes both ways, though. You can learn all the skills and technique you like, but if you don’t truly enjoy what you’re doing, why bother?

Bettering yourself as a dominant is certainly possible. It’s just like learning to be a better person. You can learn to be a dominant and then you can learn to be an amazing dominant. I think anyone with an interest in becoming something can be great at it. The fact that they’re interested combined with the fact that they practice their interest makes them that person. I am interested in being a dominant and I read about dominance, talk to other dominants and practice D/s with my submissive. That makes me a dominant. But if you only have the interest, or only have the practice, I don’t think it’s the same.

Please remember that this is my opinion, but this is what I think of these people;

-I have the interest, but don’t have the practice yet. I’m new/curious and haven’t started learning yet. That doesn’t make me a dominant, but I can become one.

-I have the skill, but I don’t really care for this role. It may have been an experiment or me trying to please a submissive partner. I am not a dominant.

-I have the interest, but I will never practice this role for whatever reasons. I will never be a dominant unless I change my mind.

-I have the interest and I practice it! I am a dominant.

Short crop

Always a good way to get a boy's attention. Though I'm not sure why she's wearing the collar, except maybe as a gothic kind of style.

I want a crop that short.

From Our Sexy Secrets.

just your everyday visit

I found this picture on Red Rump, but it's originally from nu-westleda.

I get so much joy from seeing people caning whilst wearing sweaters! Is that strange? :D

Bondagey fun

Nice matching black leather things on a handsome man, from Lady North Star.

Does anyone know who these characters are? I feel old for some reason. Maybe I'm just not into enough pop culture... not that that's a bad thing.

Got you

From Awabubbles.

The details in this picture absolutely make it for me. Their expressions, the crop behind the back, the outfit, the bondage and the gentle caress... beautiful.

Anime pet boy

A dog-boy's owner touches his cock with her sock foot while he kneels in front of her chair. I wonder if the artist intended the character to be a school girl or if the character was just dressing up like one?  I don't really understand the school girl fetish, but I do love the design of them and picking colors for uniforms.

Art from Femdom Resource.

Inherently dominant, submissive or neutral

"There is no sex position or sex act which is inherently dominant, submissive, or neutral. None. The characterization of every single sex act depends on context, a context which comes from a person’s history and the relationship between them and their partner. This is where a number of feminists and BDSM enthusiasts have gone wrong, positioning some things (being the penetrative partner, receiving oral sex) as always dominant, and their complement as always submissive."

- Sex is not the enemy