Hey. Please enjoy this dead blog. One day it may revive itself.
I doubt it.
submission/masculinity
Is it a shameful thing to be submissive?
Watch femdom porn. The men wear masks. The men have their faces turned away from the camera. The women never wear masks and you can always see their faces. Their identities aren't something they need to hide.
You know what I hear from a lot of submissive men? I can't go to a munch because of my job. People might see me. People might know who I am.
I never hear this from dominant men. I never hear this from women. I'm not saying there aren't other people out there who are worried about people finding out who they are, but I talk to a lot of kinksters.
Why is it shameful to be a submissive man?
Why is masculinity so far removed from submission in so many cultures?
Photo from redbottom83.
Pretty ropes
This is from Petxis.
Enjoy.
An object of desire
This image, this view of a woman from behind, with a man's hands around her torso from below... I know this is supposed to be the view of a dominant woman with her submissive worshipping her, with her full of power and control, but... honestly all I can see her as is an object of desire. Though that might be a form of dominance, using his desire to control him, it's not a kind of dominance that I enjoy. I mean, what happens when you age or gain weight or lose weight or anything changes? Do you lose your power over him if your power only ever stemmed from his physical desire for you?
So that form of dominance does not fit well with me, not only for that reason, but also because then dominant women are forced into society's idea of what a woman should look like and dress when being dominant. Which is this woman in the photo we're looking at. She's wearing gloves and fishnet and a corset. She's fit and beautiful. That's all you need to be a dominant.
Now, back to what I see in this photo, because I really do enjoy it and find it gorgeous.
I really enjoy objectification. I enjoy it as an artist, seeing a beautiful human-art creation, and I enjoy it as a dominant, watching someone obey their top and remain a still and amazing piece of art or furniture. So I really do enjoy this photo, just from the opposite side. I'm viewing this in a way that suggests that she is submitting to him. She is a beautiful human statue and he is enjoying being able to play with the artwork that she has become. Those hands are in control. She's just a lovely, submissive doll.
Yes, I realize that a lot of dominants enjoy dressing up and that fit and societally-deemed beautiful people are dominant as well, but I find that they are a much smaller category than the sexy fat people I know who like to play while wearing jeans or sweatpants.
Please enjoy the photo, whichever side you prefer.
bloodied and gagged
I love this piece. I actually love this artist in general, but this one in particular. I love his expression, I love the facial hair, the blood dripping down, and the colors. There's a few beautiful bite marks on his shoulder and neck.
Is he pulling something or is he just bit-gagged?
Either way, beautiful.
Return
Hello everyone, sorry for my little 5 week hiatus. Work and life in general have been absolutely insane. I'm back with a sexy photo to make up for my disappearance. Enjoy!
From Black Fantastix.
Used
The reality of that sort of play is terrifying. The fantasy might be amazing and mind-blowing, but trusting your body and your self to a stranger, or even to someone you know, without the option of safewording or escaping safely... terrifying.
On the plus side, it makes for some sexy art.
Go thank Coffee Cream for the art.
smiles
Service
I love service.
I am a sadist. During sex, I switch. I enjoy bottoming for that as well as for the occasional flogging or what-have-you, usually a thuddy implement. I'm primarily a top. I'm also a dominant.
I used to find dominance to be absolutely exhausting.
To stay in the frame of mind where I am the Master, I must be in control, I must be strict and cruel and creative and completely in charge, as well as kind and merciful and loving is hard for me. I prefer to be a creative sadist. I'm very hands on and when it comes to more emotional or mental scenes, I tend to get tired pretty quickly and revert to my sadistic self, since I'm a more physical person.
Which I'm sure is a bit frustrating for my boy, who is not only a wonderfully tough maso (our pet name for masochists) but also very submissive. He needs submission to be able to get himself together somedays. Just like we both need a good kicking-the-shit-out-of-him scene when we haven't played for awhile. Most kinksters will agree it's a major stress-relief.
So, while I find dominance to be exhausting, especially when I was first stepping into the role (back when I had no idea what a sadist even was) I find the idea of service to be totally liberating. I can focus on my needs and without putting much creative thought into it, this fulfills the needs of my submissive. I can ask for food, drink, massage, attention. Even me saying 'pet meeee!' is demanding a bit of service, albeit in the whiniest voice possible.
The big D/s scenes are more fun this way, though we haven't done one in awhile. I find it's easier if I break it down into little things. Boot worship, maybe throw in some sadism there, add a bit of body worship, orgasm control, bondage...
I admit, I used to panic when I stepped into my D/s role. My brain would immediately rush from idea to idea and the scene would turn into a jumble. I'd threaten him with certain things and never follow through. I'd forget what I was doing and confuse him completely when I asked for several things at once. Note to self (and other D-types who have this problem); be clear when you're instructing someone. They can't read your mind and they really want to make you happy.
It's taken some time, but now that we're here, I find that I really enjoy having a butler as much as I enjoy having a maso. I love having him 'run the household'. Though a lot of people on the outside of our relationship have commented on how T seems to run everything and be in charge, the duty of a butler is to keep everything running and to make sure their master doesn't have to.
And really, I'd be awful at taking care of a wine cellar (not that we have one).
Not everyone who is submissive is good at service, or wants to be. It takes dedication, love, a stubborn perfectionism and eye for detail. I only wish I could be more the Master my boy deserves. <3
Sex
I admit, I had to post this one because her hair reminds me of Andromeda's hair from my earlier post. That is some amazing hair!
Also, though this blog is about sex as well as kink, bdsm, etc, it's pretty rare that I post pictures of penetrative sex, especially with a straight couple. It certainly used to squick me, as a gender-unhappy kinky person who is usually seen as lady-shaped, but I also didn't want this blog to be seen as porn. Yes, it's certainly porny and sexy and full of wank-fodder, but having vanilla-ish sex posted often or even at all just sat wrong with me. But to be uncomfortable by something consensual and lovely (like this photo) is kind of silly, so we might be getting more photos of penetrative, vaginal sex.
So, here, have some sex; a lovely female top using her handcuffed boy to get herself off.
PS, Real Dominant Women, I really like a lot of your photos, but your name makes me think of 'the ONE TWUE WAY' and makes me giggle/sad.
Andromeda
Andromeda was chained to a rock as a sacrifice to a sea monster (which you can see in the bottom left, if you stop staring at the naked lady) because of her mother's bragging. Oh, mythology, you're so kinky.
This is why I started painting. Not because of this painting specifically, but because this is how I wanted to be able to paint.
Ambiguous
I both like and dislike this photo. I like that he's holding her hair, that she's got a cigarette and that her body language is just so relaxed. I'm sort of 50/50 on the bracelet he's wearing. A lot of people mix the goth style into kink and I'm meh about that. But as sensation play, those spikes could be a lot of fun, so I'm all for that side of it.
I like him grabbing her, but both his hands seem so tense. That might just be the amount of pressure he's using to pull/squeeze, but it doesn't look comfortable. Part of what I've learned about bdsm is that the top should be worried about pulling a muscle as much as they should be worried about hurting their bottom. Play comfortably or be prepared to hurt yourself.
The part I have the most issue with... is that I can't see their faces. Though this is a lovely photo, it could be completely one way or the other just by the expressions that we can't see. Is she bored? Is he angry?
I like being able to see happy people playing, and I can't read their body language well enough to say 'wow, these people are so happy together, grabbing and being grabbed. That's awesome'.
Sweet little pinch
I'm not usually into shaved lady-parts, but this is a pretty awesome photo.
From Cyanide Mishka.
Enjoyment
Fanfiction also has a lot of 'no, don't tie me up, it's humiliating', but I can find ones I like more easily. And I like writing it too, so even better.
appealing objects
All of these are from Alexander.
I would love to see things like this more often on sites like fetlife. If you're into kink and you're looking to attract a dominant/top/whatever and one of your interests is objectification, why not post a photo of it? I think that would be much better received than a picture of, oh, say, your penis.
Lovely work from a great model. Very creative, different poses to be a table of different heights.
Great stuff!
Happy and blindfolded
I love pictures of happy people doing happy, cute bdsm things together. You don't always have to look stern and tough and angry when you blindfold people. That's fine for scenes and certain kinds of play, but sometimes it's nice to roll around and play and giggle and be happy that you can enjoy this together.
From My Darker Side.
held
I'm not sure if this is breath play, or just a very possessive hug, but the atmosphere is so calm and soft. I don't usually care about full frontal nudity in art, but it's interesting to see a picture of two naked people touching without actually seeing their genitals or breasts.
Device and tease
Look at those! So cool!
From Passius.
Butchness/selfness
I used to hate the word butch.
When I was younger, it was always such a taunt. As I've posted before, I was often teased for being masculine and as I'd been brought up with society's views of how little girls should think, act and look, I thought being masculine - being butch- was an awful thing.
I also rebelled at being feminine. I hated wearing dresses, I refused to shave my legs for a long time and whenever we played pretend, I was a boy.
When I got to be about 21 or so, I began to come to terms with my butchness. I was getting fatter, I had my head half shaved and I really, really loved being male to my partner. I don't present as male most of the time. It's not something I'm ready to do. But if I couldn't be my masculine, butch self with my boy, I doubt I'd be as sane as I am. I've been a boy in my relationships since I was sixteen, which is part of the reason I started dating girls. None of the boys I was interested in understood that, but girls, especially 16 year old bi or curious ones, tended not to care what gender I presented as in private.
Still, I've only just started to realize how much my image of myself is of this butch person. When my hair was long, I was pretty. And I appreciated it. But it felt like I was appreciating someone else. 'Oh, she's pretty. Definitely not me, but pretty,' was about all I felt about it.
Now that my hair is buzzed on the sides again, I feel so much more at home. Which is an odd feeling. Apparently I need to be able to see my scalp in order to feel like myself.
When I was younger, it was always such a taunt. As I've posted before, I was often teased for being masculine and as I'd been brought up with society's views of how little girls should think, act and look, I thought being masculine - being butch- was an awful thing.
I also rebelled at being feminine. I hated wearing dresses, I refused to shave my legs for a long time and whenever we played pretend, I was a boy.
When I got to be about 21 or so, I began to come to terms with my butchness. I was getting fatter, I had my head half shaved and I really, really loved being male to my partner. I don't present as male most of the time. It's not something I'm ready to do. But if I couldn't be my masculine, butch self with my boy, I doubt I'd be as sane as I am. I've been a boy in my relationships since I was sixteen, which is part of the reason I started dating girls. None of the boys I was interested in understood that, but girls, especially 16 year old bi or curious ones, tended not to care what gender I presented as in private.
Still, I've only just started to realize how much my image of myself is of this butch person. When my hair was long, I was pretty. And I appreciated it. But it felt like I was appreciating someone else. 'Oh, she's pretty. Definitely not me, but pretty,' was about all I felt about it.
Now that my hair is buzzed on the sides again, I feel so much more at home. Which is an odd feeling. Apparently I need to be able to see my scalp in order to feel like myself.
I would be sad if I were not the fat, butch, hairy, half-shaved head person that I am.
Fuck labels, really. I'm a lot of things. Several of them are contradictions. That's okay. I'm me.
Wheelchair Worship
From Lab Coat Lingerie.
When this picture was taken, I had barely begun adulthood and I thought my life was over. I was twenty-one. Many of my health conditions were undiagnosed or untreated. I was sick. I was tired. I wanted to think of myself as strong, but I was just a kid who was lost and confused because my body was breaking. I felt isolated from my friends, who couldn’t understand what I was going through. I couldn’t take care of myself very well. I was so tired that getting out of bed took a huge effort. If I wanted to go somewhere farther than my apartment, I had to use a power chair.
When this picture was taken, I had barely begun adulthood and I thought my life was over. I was twenty-one. Many of my health conditions were undiagnosed or untreated. I was sick. I was tired. I wanted to think of myself as strong, but I was just a kid who was lost and confused because my body was breaking. I felt isolated from my friends, who couldn’t understand what I was going through. I couldn’t take care of myself very well. I was so tired that getting out of bed took a huge effort. If I wanted to go somewhere farther than my apartment, I had to use a power chair.
I have never felt less sexy than when I
was in my wheelchair.
My chair is not sexy. It is
upholstered in a color I can only describe as “medical gray,” a color that says
“I have zero personality.” It is a color that says “I am functional and
not sexy, because why on earth would I need to be sexy?” The plastic of
the chair is red, but not a “fuck me” red. It is not a red that evokes
any sort of lust or hints at any secret desire. It is a “we needed to
make this a customizable, so you have a choice of red or blue, isn’t that nice”
red. The chair as a whole is bulky and not especially well-designed for
comfort. Form, I suspect, was not a factor in its design. It is
simple, but inelegant, minimalist only insofar as it has few features. It
is almost purely designed for the function of getting from point A to point B,
and, truthfully, not very well even for that.
Disabled sexuality is virtually erased
in our society. People with disabilities are, at best, considered
nonsexual, entirely lacking in sexual identity. At worst, we are seen as
perverts merely for having sexual desires. And
we are, above all, undesirable.
The aesthetic of my power chair reflects this–why bother make something sexy
when the person using it isn’t going to be having sex?
There is a difference between impairment
and disability. To borrow a definition from Stacey Milbern, “impairment is the reality of what
your body is able to do, and disability is what society disallows your body to
do because it has an impairment.” I have a degenerative illness.
Whether I am in a wheelchair or not, my body is impaired. Pain and
fatigue are not perceivable by the naked eye. But once I sit in my
wheelchair, my disability becomes visible and I can no longer “pass” for able-bodied. When I sit in my
wheelchair, the status of my disability does not change, but the way society
views me does. Suddenly I am an object of pity rather than desire.
When I roll down the street, people avert their eyes.
I don’t want people to see “past” my
disability. I want them to see me as a whole person, including my
impairments. I have fucked someone in my wheelchair. (I have fucked
a couple of someones in my wheelchair, actually, I mean, not to brag or
anything.) It was physically awkward and uncomfortable, and also? incredibly
hot, because I was living out this idea, that my illness is a part of who I am,
deserving of love, just like the rest of me. I also tended to dress more
provocatively when using my chair for a similar reason–I wanted to forcibly
turn people’s eyes toward me, to demand from them the desire that I knew I
deserved.
The photo at the beginning of this post
is one of the oldest sexy pictures I have of myself. I took it to make a
point. I wanted to confront people with their preconceptions about
disability and desirability. With this picture, I wanted to do what
social norms prevented me from doing, to scream, “Look at me! SEE me.
Recognize me as who I am, a sexual being!”
I no longer use my
powerchair. I still have it, but I am on a combination of medications
that render it unnecessary, at least for the moment. I do still use a
manual wheelchair in certain circumstances. I dream of the day when
pushing my wheelchair is seen as a service, not a chore. Some day sleek,
sexy wheelchairs will be the norm. Some day someone will worship my
wheelchair, and me, in my wheelchair. When that day comes, I will
sit as in a throne, and I will be powerful and broken and beautiful and whole.
**
I really have nothing to add to this entry from Lab Coat Lingerie, except that I felt it was important to share it.
Double caning
Even though I'm not a fan of tops wearing heels and corsets, I do like the naked top and I really enjoy this piece.
From Otto's Spanking Art.
Polished
Do you know what I love best about having my boy clean and polish my boots?
For the next week or so, however long the shine lasts, every time I look down at my boots, or put them on, or take them off, I think about him. I get this wonderful rise of emotions. Pride at having such a practical and considerate boy. Lust, remembering him rubbing the polish into my boots with his fingers, being able to feel it through the leather and the fun that ensued. And of course love, for someone so invaluable who deems me worthy to be their dominant.
There is nothing more wonderful than having someone you admire and respect go down on their knees and polish your boots for you.
Did I mention I got new boots?
Did I mention that we've been playing with boots a lot lately?
Heh, there might be a lot more posts about boots for awhile. Hope no one minds!
Worshipful
She has a very nice body, and though she might be a model, she's also very human, which I can't always say about bdsm models. She has circles under her eyes, her hair is a bit wild, she's looking down at the camera with an expression somewhere in between a smile and a glare.
Above all, I love that they're both naked (as far as we can tell). No fetwear on either of them (I don't count strap-ons as fetwear, that's like calling a penis fetwear). When I play, generally I wear nothing or I wear pants and boots, depending on the scene. I've never understood the appeal of corsets if there is going to be actual play. Yes, they're beautiful, yes I really appreciate seeing people in them, but playing with a bottom who's wearing one is like playing with half the bottom, since hitting them over their corset is not going to happen. And being a top wearing a corset... bad idea! Less mobility, not very comfortable. You know all the advice we were given as kids about dressing for field trips? Get a good sleep, eat a good breakfast and dress comfortably? Those all apply to play, especially the last one.
Great photo from Strap on Slaves.
First try
Photo from Captured Guy.
monoglove
Those are some awesome tattoo ideas too. Yum.
From Hatze.
Back to back
A lovely shot from Ettone.
the pound
Photo from i honor her.
Going to the pound is always sad. I always want to take them all home with me.
Heh, the top photo is like... a high class pet breeder. The bottom is a sketchy place in some basement where most of the pets were abducted.
Heh, the top photo is like... a high class pet breeder. The bottom is a sketchy place in some basement where most of the pets were abducted.
Bound God
a grip on her bit
It's one of those weeks for me, so no clever comments. Again. Just enjoy.
Cropping
Is he trying to cover his butt to protect it or is he spreading his cheeks to give her access to what she wants?
Humiliation or Humility
Humility; the quality of being honest and respectful.
Humiliation; the abasement of pride; being reduced to a state of lowliness.
I can see where the root is the same. But being humble and being humiliated are two entirely different things.
Having humility, in my mind, is being aware of who you are and the possibilities around you. You don't know what sort of experiences and knowledge can be offered by everyone around you, therefore you are humble and respectful of those around you. You are respectful of yourself, the people and things around you and you act with care.
Humiliation, that's something entirely different.
I'm not sure why people feel the need to be humiliated. So many people describe it in an erotic way and I just don't get it. Why is wearing women's underwear humiliating to men? Why is licking someone's feet or boots humiliating? Why is getting fucked humiliating?
If you've consented to whatever humiliating event is happening, how is it humiliation? Is licking your Mistress's feet after begging her to be able to do so humiliating? Is it really making you less prideful? Is it humiliating to be urinated on by your Master after you expressed an interest in trying watersports? Does it make you feel low?
I like licking my boy's toes and sucking them. But it doesn't make me feel low. It makes me happy. It makes me happy because he squirms and giggles and he enjoys it. I love having him suck my toes too, so I know how good it feels and I want him to experience it too.
Watersports are another thing I don't consider humiliating. Your top is marking you as theirs. What could possibly be humiliating about that? That's something to take pride in, if anything. Same with so many 'humiliating' activities.
There is an excitement to consensual non-consent and I understand the importance of role play, but it still wouldn't be something I would ever consider humiliating.
Perhaps humiliation play is a better term for it.
Maybe I'm just wordy today.
Humiliation; the abasement of pride; being reduced to a state of lowliness.
I can see where the root is the same. But being humble and being humiliated are two entirely different things.
Having humility, in my mind, is being aware of who you are and the possibilities around you. You don't know what sort of experiences and knowledge can be offered by everyone around you, therefore you are humble and respectful of those around you. You are respectful of yourself, the people and things around you and you act with care.
Humiliation, that's something entirely different.
I'm not sure why people feel the need to be humiliated. So many people describe it in an erotic way and I just don't get it. Why is wearing women's underwear humiliating to men? Why is licking someone's feet or boots humiliating? Why is getting fucked humiliating?
If you've consented to whatever humiliating event is happening, how is it humiliation? Is licking your Mistress's feet after begging her to be able to do so humiliating? Is it really making you less prideful? Is it humiliating to be urinated on by your Master after you expressed an interest in trying watersports? Does it make you feel low?
I like licking my boy's toes and sucking them. But it doesn't make me feel low. It makes me happy. It makes me happy because he squirms and giggles and he enjoys it. I love having him suck my toes too, so I know how good it feels and I want him to experience it too.
Watersports are another thing I don't consider humiliating. Your top is marking you as theirs. What could possibly be humiliating about that? That's something to take pride in, if anything. Same with so many 'humiliating' activities.
There is an excitement to consensual non-consent and I understand the importance of role play, but it still wouldn't be something I would ever consider humiliating.
Perhaps humiliation play is a better term for it.
Maybe I'm just wordy today.
Pedicure
Boys, this is the way to convince your vanilla partner to dominate you. Most vanilla people don't realize that D/s can be something as simple as a pedicure, being served dinner, having their taxes done, their hair brushed, getting a massage.
I think service oriented D/s is the best kind.
He's tied up
Ride
Wonderful pony, great gear and the suggestion of a happier times to come.
From the wonderful Audrey Dutroux.
rope leash
For once, I really don't mind the shaved look. Normally I much prefer hair, but she's got a really lovely shape and she looks cute shaved.
From the very talented Brutal Hawk.
over the table
It seems I have to write either something insightful or 'oo, pretty' for each post.
This will be another 'oo, pretty'.
I like the bicep cuffs. That'd look really sexy on my boy.
Scarring
Photo from Alex.
Toybox
Cute spanked butt and... really, that's such a lovely toybox, as well as a lovely toy inside. :)
I think we have that dildo. o.O
From Fuck yeah male submission.
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